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This is satirical commentary in the style of the late, legendary George Carlin—raw, unfiltered, unapologetic, and 100% protected by the First Amendment and the sacred art of yelling truth at power. If you mistake this for news, therapy, or a permission slip to be an asshole, that’s on you.

The names mentioned—like Pete Hegseth, Donald Trump, or anyone else allergic to integrity—are public figures. Their inclusion in this roast comes with the territory of public influence and...

Legal Disclaimer

This is a satirical commentary in the style of George Carlin. If you're DHS, ICE, or just a red-hatted bureaucrat with a clipboard and a confused moral compass—yes, we're talking about you. Public figures, public policy, public consequences. If it stings, maybe fix the fing system***.

"Born in the USA? Prove It, Or Pack Your Sh*t"

A George Carlin-Style Rant on Deporting American Citizens

So here we go again.

The Department of Homeland Security—America’s favorite paranoid uncle...

Legal Disclaimer

This is satire in the style of George Carlin. That means it’s got teeth, it’s pissed off, and it does not care if it hurts your feelings—especially if you wrote the executive order. If you’re allergic to honesty, bite marks, or truth with a side of profanity, turn around now.

“DEI? More Like ‘Don’t Educate Intelligently!’”

A George Carlin-Style Rant on Trump’s War Against K-12 Education (and the Judge Who Bitch-Slapped It)

So, Donald J. Trump—president, emperor, and...

Legal Disclaimer

This is a George Carlin-style rant. It includes historical betrayal, authoritarian bootlicking, foreign policy fraudulence, and language not safe for press conferences. If you’re here to defend it—don’t. If you’re here to scream at it—pull up a chair.

"Abandoning Ukraine: American Hypocrisy, Now with Fewer Webpages!"

A George Carlin Rant About How We’re Handing Putin Exactly What He Wants—on Stationery

So.

The U.S. just made Ukraine an offer.

A “peace plan,” they called it.

...

Legal Disclaimer

This is a George Carlin-style rant. It contains adult language, brutal sarcasm, and very few surviving illusions. It is not here to make you feel good about policy. It’s here to drag it out into the daylight, pour gasoline on it, and light a cigarette just to throw the match.

"AI in Schools? We're Gonna Automate the Ignorance!"

A George Carlin-Style Rant on the Latest Educational Gimmick

So the Trump administration signed an executive order to bring artificial intelligence...

Legal Disclaimer

This is a George Carlin-style satirical rant. That means profanity, mockery, truth-bombs, and absolutely no apologies. If you’re looking for economic nuance or gentle analysis, go hang out with your hedge fund manager and cry into your stock portfolio. Otherwise—buckle up, buttercup.

“Tariffs, Tantrums, and the Fine Art of Economic Arson”

A George Carlin-Style Rant on Trump’s Trade War Reboot

So, here we are again.

President Spray Tan has slapped tariffs on the global economy...

"Accredit This, You Bureaucratic Bastards!"

A George Carlin-style Rant on Trump’s Higher Ed Executive Orders

Ahh, higher education. The sacred temple of knowledge.

Where students go to get into lifelong debt while learning about the mating rituals of 14th-century Flemish goats.

But don’t worry—Trump’s here to fix it!

And when Trump fixes things, it’s like giving a toddler a blowtorch and telling him to "redecorate the kitchen."

EO #1: Accreditation ‘Reform’

Oh boy.

Trump signed an executive...

This fictional rant is a satirical homage to the late, great George Carlin—comedian, truth-teller, linguistic demolition expert, and national treasure. George Carlin did not write or perform this piece (because necromancy is, sadly, still illegal in most jurisdictions). Any resemblance to real persons, events, or cable news guests with suspicious hairlines is purely intentional and delivered with love, rage, and a raised eyebrow.

This post contains strong language, unapologetic political...

The Fertility Report

White House, West Wing – April 17, 2046

Subterranean Briefing Room C

The air was filtered. The coffee was synthetic. The mood was… muted.

President Mitchell scanned the half-empty room. “Where’s the Surgeon General?”

“Dead, sir,” said Chief of Staff Raynor. “Sepsis. Postnatal. Rural delivery center lost funding. No backup.”

A beat.

Mitchell exhaled through his nose. “Add it to the list.”

He turned to the big screen. The words U.S. POPULATION REPORT – CLASSIFIED blinked in gray....

Dry Season

The wind changed at 2:13 p.m.

Not a whisper of warning. Just a gust that turned the sky orange and set the ridge ablaze.

Maggie Thomas was still on the phone with the state emergency office when her porch caught fire.

“We’re aware of the situation in your county,” said the calm, utterly doomed voice. “Please shelter in place until responders arrive.”

“There are no responders,” Maggie said. “You fired them.”

The line crackled. “Ma’am, the State Emergency Management Agency is operating at...

Registry

The knock came at 6:17 a.m.

Not a pounding. Not a battering ram. A polite knock. That was worse.

Ellie didn’t answer. Not right away. She checked the feed on her slate—four government vans parked across the street. Two uniformed officers on the stoop. One drone hovering, lens already calibrated to her biometric ID.

She tucked her son tighter into the blanket. Leo stirred. He was always warm in the mornings, cheeks red, curls plastered to his forehead with sleep-sweat. Ten years old....

In 1776, a group of ragtag colonies—poorly armed, geographically scattered, and politically divided—declared war on the most powerful empire the world had ever seen.

Not over taxes.

Not over tea.

But because a long list of offenses finally tipped the scale from patience to rebellion.

Today, we find ourselves staring at a political landscape that feels all too familiar. With the Trump administration barreling through its second term, the echoes of King George’s abuses aren’t just academic. They’re...

Good news, fellow readers, genre nerds, and chaos gremlins—I’m getting out of the writing cave and into the wild this year! If you’ve ever wanted to chat sci-fi, snag a signed book, or ask what inspired that scene (you know the one), now’s your chance.

Here’s where I’ll be appearing this spring and summer:

April 27 – Pueblo MiniCon

Sangre de Cristo Arts Center, Pueblo, CO

Small but mighty, this con is a gem. Come for the art, stay for the nerds. I’ll be there slinging stories and probably...

"Containment Breach"

Mira Chen had twenty minutes to decide whether to go public or watch a thousand people die.

The cooler door hissed shut behind her, sealing her into the quarantine lab. Even with triple filters running, the stench of rot was starting to win. The sample bag on the steel table pulsed faintly, the meat inside greening at the edges like it was trying to grow something new.

“Was this inspected?” she barked into her headset.

A pause. Then her assistant’s voice crackled: “Shipment...

There are moments in history when the masks slip. When authoritarian leanings stop whispering and start shouting. We just had one of those moments.

This past week, the Trump administration crossed a line many of us have warned about—but few truly believed they’d see: open discussion of deporting American citizens to foreign prisons without trial or due process. Not to Guantanamo. Not to a classified black site. But to CECOT, El Salvador’s mega-prison infamous for its brutal conditions and...

Chapter Seven: Love Thyself

by Taylor Anne Vigil

When you grow up convinced you’re hard to love, kindness can feel like a lie. It takes time — real time — to believe someone might see your broken pieces and not flinch.

This chapter is where things get quieter, but heavier. Where the body aches and the heart speaks. Where care shows up in microwaved soup, midnight medicine hunts, and the simple, aching bravery of staying beside someone who’s hurting.

Taylor peels back another layer here — not just...

It started with a name.

Not a bomb threat. Not a breach of national security. Not even a meme that went viral for the wrong reasons.

Just a name.

When Ms. Rivera stood at the front of her classroom and called roll, she paused—like she always did—at “Allison.” The girl sitting in the third row raised her hand and said, “It’s Aiden now.”

Ms. Rivera smiled and said, “Got it. Aiden.” Then moved on to “Jacob.” It took three seconds. No classroom disruption. No dramatic gasp. Just a teacher doing what...

When fiction becomes warning—and warning becomes prophecy

Dear Readers,

If you’re a fan of classic science fiction, you’ve probably heard of the Crazy Years.

Robert A. Heinlein coined the term in his Future History timeline to describe a period of rising irrationality and chaos in American society—a cultural breakdown where logic was optional and extremism became normalized. The Crazy Years paved the way for a religious dictator named Nehemiah Scudder to take power—ending American democracy in...

The risks authors face, and why we must speak louder

Dear Readers,

If you’ve noticed fewer author events lately—fewer book tours, fewer panels, fewer names on convention guest lists—you’re not imagining it.

And no, it’s not burnout. It’s not laziness. It’s not just the cost of plane tickets.

It’s fear.

And for some of us, it's a question of survival.

But for those of us who aren’t targeted—for authors like me, a cishet white man—the fear is not a reason to stop.

It's a reason to lean in harder.

Why...

“The Citizen”

They came for Maya at 6:42 AM.

It was a Tuesday. The sun hadn't even finished rising over the New Mexico horizon when she heard the sharp knock—three raps, fast and official. She shuffled to the door in sweatpants, phone still plugged in, coffee machine half-started. When she opened it, the ICE officers were already stepping in, hands on tasers, voices clipped and cold.

“Maya Sullivan?”

“Yes?”

“You’re being detained for violations of immigration law.”

She blinked. “I was born in Santa...