⚠️ DISCLAIMER: The following rant contains extreme sarcasm, brutal honesty, and an unhealthy respect for logic. Side effects may include snorting, fist-pumping, and a sudden urge to yell at your elected officials. If you’re offended, you might be part of the problem. 

You know what, folks? I’m gonna start off on a rare note of agreement.

You run a child porn ring?

You lie to get into this country and cover it up with kiddie smut on your hard drive?

Then yeah—revoke your damn citizenship. Put your ass on the first boat to Hell. And if Hell is out of shipping containers, El Paso will do.

But see, here's where we pivot into nightmare fuel.

Because the same government that’s setting itself up as the moral gatekeeper for 25 million naturalized citizens... is also the one with a magical DELETE key that can erase your existence from a database faster than you can say “Driving While Brown.”

So imagine this:

You’re out for a drive. You get pulled over. Cop runs your plates.

“Huh. Doesn’t seem to be registered.”

You pull out your ID.

“Sir, this isn’t valid. You’re not in the system.”

Your passport card?

Also fake, apparently.

And before you can even say “I was born in Cleveland,” ICE is ziptied around your wrists like you're the last contestant in Deportation Idol.

All because your last name is Gonzalez instead of Goldstein or Gabbard, and somewhere in the guts of the new SuperUltraPatriotDatabase™, a tech bro deleted your citizenship record in favor of a new line item:

"Flagged: Possibly Not American Enough."

And now we’re letting the same clowns add entries too?

Think about it: If they can erase you, they can also fabricate you.

“Sir, it says here you were affiliated with a gang in 2007.”

Funny, because in 2007 you were ten years old and your biggest crime was losing your Pokémon cards.

Doesn’t matter. It's on the record now. Boom. You're out.

Meanwhile, actual citizens—natural-born, beer-drinking, flag-waving pedophiles—get their day in court. Probation. Maybe house arrest in a McMansion.

Nobody’s yanking their citizenship.

Nobody’s saying “Sorry, sir, we’re sending you to a foreign jail with no legal recourse. Good luck not being tortured.”

Because they were born here. In the right zip code. With the right skin tone.

Which, in this administration, is apparently the new oath of allegiance.

And don’t give me that “we’re only going after the bad ones” crap.

That’s what they always say before they come for you.

The bad ones, the suspicious ones, the ones who donated to the wrong charity or answered a form incorrectly in 1993.

The bar’s not just low—it’s fucking invisible.

So let’s be clear:

This isn’t about safety.

It’s not about justice.

It’s about control.

And if they can erase your name with one keystroke, they sure as hell can write you off the Constitution.