⚖️ Legal Disclaimer

 This is satire in the style of George Carlin. That means it’s got teeth, it’s pissed off, and it does not care if it hurts your feelings—especially if you wrote the executive order. If you’re allergic to honesty, bite marks, or truth with a side of profanity, turn around now.

🎤 “DEI? More Like ‘Don’t Educate Intelligently!’”

 A George Carlin-Style Rant on Trump’s War Against K-12 Education (and the Judge Who Bitch-Slapped It)

So, Donald J. Trump—president, emperor, and self-declared valedictorian of Trump University—decided that what’s really destroying America isn't poverty, gun violence, or lead in the water.

Nope.

It's diversity.

Because nothing terrifies a man like Trump more than a room full of kids learning that maybe, just maybe, America isn’t perfect.

🚫 Executive Order 14190: “Kill the Curriculum”

 He signed Executive Order 14190—which sounds like a Terminator model, and that’s fitting, because it’s designed to terminate thought.

The order bans “radical indoctrination” in K-12 schools.

Translation?

“No more gender, no more race, no more nuance. Just flags, God, and pictures of bald eagles sh*tting freedom onto the desks.”

And if teachers dare to talk about structural racism?

 Or say that maybe trans kids aren’t demonic sleeper agents from Wokeistan?

Boom—funding gone.

 Federal support pulled faster than a fire alarm in a school play about gay penguins.

🧑‍⚖️ Enter the Judge: The Hero with a Gavel

 But THEN—oh, then—it gets fun.

Because a federal judge looked at this “ban DEI or else” order and said:

“Unconstitutionally vague? Try pants-on-fire unconstitutional, motherf*er.”**

She blocked it.

She said, “You can’t just threaten to starve public schools with a buzzword and a Bible verse.”

She said, “Teachers have First Amendment rights.”

She said, “We don’t do book burnings by executive memo in this country.”

At least not yet.

🤖 Trump’s Vision of Education: Patriotism with No Brains

 You know what Trump wants in schools?

• History books that end in 1954
• Science teachers who think the Earth is flat and 6,000 years old
• Health class taught by abstinence-only gym teachers who think menstruation is a liberal hoax
• And guidance counselors who hand out Jesus stickers instead of mental health support

You think I’m kidding?

This guy thinks DEI stands for “Don’t Educate Independents.”

And the worst part?

There’s a whole army of people cheering this on like it’s the Super Bowl of Stupid.

🧨 Final Thought?

 This isn’t about “radical ideology.”

 It’s about making kids too dumb to fight back.

Because when kids learn about race?

 They start asking questions.

When kids learn about gender?

 They stop judging.

And when kids learn critical f*ing thinking**?

They realize that authoritarianism isn’t freedom, and ignorance isn’t patriotic.

This judge stopped the train—but the tracks are still laid.

 And these bastards will keep coming, shovel in hand, screaming:

“Protect the children!”

While they strip them of knowledge, dignity, and a goddamn future.