Disclaimer:

The following rant contains harsh truths and foul language. If you’re allergic to either, your deductible just went up. George is not a doctor, but he knows bullshit when he smells it.

You hear what the Republicans cooked up this time? They yanked away the ACA tax credits — the only thing keeping working people from getting bent over by the insurance companies. And then they’ve got the nerve, the balls, the pure corporate chutzpah to say: “Oh, your premiums are too high now? Don’t worry, we’ve got a plan!”

And the plan is: catastrophic coverage.

Perfect name. Because the catastrophe is when you need to use it. Ten thousand dollars out of your pocket before the insurance even thinks about covering squat. Twenty-one grand for a family. Who the fuck has that? Nobody! But don’t worry, you get three primary care visits a year. Three! One for the cough, one for the rash, and one for the ulcer you got from stressing about the deductible. After that? You’re on your own, baby.

That’s not health care. That’s casino gambling with your life as the stake. The house always wins, and the house is run by billionaires with gold toilets.

And here’s the kicker: the only reason premiums are shooting up in the first place is because they let the premium subsidies expire. They caused the problem. Then they sell you the solution: less coverage, higher bills, pray to God you don’t get sick. Meanwhile, those billions they saved by cutting subsidies for you? Straight into the pockets of their rich pals. You get catastrophic insurance, they get catastrophic profits.

And now some of these Republican fucks are sweating. Why? Because it’s their base — red-state folks, rural folks — who are gonna feel the pain. People who already have to drive three counties to find a doctor. When they can’t pay the premiums, when they get stuck with medical debt instead of coverage, who are they gonna blame? Democrats? Not this time. They know who lit the fuse. So now you hear whispers: “Maybe we extend the subsidies one more year.” Yeah. Not to save your ass. To save their own goddamn seats.

But let’s be real. The long game is obvious: starve the ACA, break it, watch it collapse, and then strut around saying, “See? Obamacare never worked!” It’s like stabbing somebody, watching them bleed out, and saying, “Guess he wasn’t that healthy to begin with.”

This is what passes for health care policy in America: pay every month, pay when you’re sick, pay when you die, and when you’re broke, get the fuck out of the way. Catastrophic coverage. Corporate euthanasia with a nice little government seal on it.

And FOTUS? He’s still out there, yapping about his “great healthcare plan.” You remember that? The one that’s always coming next week? Yeah. That’s the joke, folks. The plan is for you to shut up, pay up, and die quietly.